i get turned down more than a collar. where are the desperate bitches i need to crawl to them
walked into a party last night, i saw 3 ex gfs standing in a circle talking to each other...that's the quickest u-turn i've ever made in my life.
I'm on a cruise to the Bahamas and this text message is gunna cost me $10 but I need you to pray on my behalf for the things I'm about to do these 2 girls and what I did last night to a 35 year old mother of 3.
we do all of our sexting over chat on words with friends, so my boyfriend doesn't know about it when he looks at my texts.
I hit a bug from across the room with my flip flop boomerang style. That awesome.
I take back everything I said about communal showers
Pregnant only lasts nine months, being hot takes way longer to go away. So yes, I will continue to hit on the hot pregnant girl.
If this week is any indication of my life here I've got to get out ASAP. My liver can't hack it.
I've been drunk in my life. But I've never been "crying in 5 Guys at 1 in the afternoon" drunk
Are you trying to say I've made an emotionally well rounded transformation similar to the Grinch?
I've just had two stress filled days in a row , I'm just going to shower and await your penis
It's not vacation until I get called "disgustinly sexy" by an fat woman whose older than my mother.
So, my eyeglasses somehow ended up in my nightstand drawer and they're covered in lube.
She came into the salon and said, "Don't judge me. Yes that's cum in my hair and I want a shampoo, cut and style."
Just googled myself and a bunch of boob shots of me came up. Apparently my phone automatically uploaded them to my google plus.
Please google me ASAP and ensure I corrected this...
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