So is it bad that I'm using this 21 year old for his hot bod and utter naivety?
No its what 21 year olds are made for
but his dog just died...ill send him an edible arrangement or a 6 pack or something
were doing shots for every snowflake that hits the ground
my vagina's been through so much this weekend
you mean so much has been through your vagina this weekend?
Just saying. If you end up in canada tomorrow morning at least youll have my text to remind you how it happened
you thought your balls were fighting each other...
Thanks for the ave Maria song you left on my phone that lasted for TEN minutes.
I seem to remember you being very disappointed that drinking Michelob Ultra didn't give you magic powers.
Her boyfriend only talks to me because I know her period schedule
She's like the King Midas of sexual confusion. Everything she touches turns to gay.
OMG I WAS JUST THINKING ABOUT HOW OUR FRIENDSHIP IS SO REAL BECAUSE I SHOW YOU DICK PICS AND WE LAUGH TOGETHER.
I swear every time I see him he's either dancing or trying to touch people
I'm at my friends house alone, she's at spin class so I'm wearing her engagement ring and eating buffalo wings. It's 9:30am. Happy Valentine's Day.
it's unicorns you uncultured swine
I woke up while she was taking a panoramic photo of my morning wood
Randomize
