I have a new suitor he got my # last nite... I was to tipsy to function! What was I thinking!! It's like u when u first met me
Tell Heather sorry for burning her hair. Also for anything else that I may have done that warrants and apology. Anything after about 10pm is kind of hazy.
GO HOME AND LIKE EVERYTHING ON COLT'S FACEBOOK UNTIL 2007.
Wtf it's a Friday night?
PRIORITIZE.
He has been begging me for a Bj but doesnt want to get mono
How is he gunna get mono? is he gunna suck on his dick after you?
I may also break bread with strippers. Because it is passover.
Just filled up my pledge keg goblet with coffee at bp. They can judge all they want. At least I'm not killing baby dolphins.
I specifically found a fat girl to lift me up on her shoulders.\n\nIt was glorious.
I find it worrying that she bit me in bed. Then proceeded to write her name in bite marks. All without ever losing the rhythm of our fucking.
you're avoiding the subject, i want to know how you ended up at the strip club with the dog, fucker
Girl we've come a long way since our first Brazilian wax
But now I'm just thinking when he said he "worked for the airline" he actually meant drug smuggling.
We were mid fuck, and he did a Kermit the Frog impression. Is it weird that I was strangely turned on?
he pissed the bed, like I literally woke up and he was pissing right beside me. With the electric blanket he's lucky he didn't get electrocuted
My hangover headache is somewhere in the Harry Potter scar neighborhood. I can now empathize with that poor bastard.
How can i make it up 2 u?
DREW I AM SMOKING POT AND FUCKING. WE CANNOT DISCUSS THIS AT THIS PARTICULAR JUNCTURE.
Randomize
