since i spend so many of my nights sleeping on the bathroom floor i think im going to remove all toiletries from under my sink and replace them with a pillow and blanket.
Just found out my mom tried to sue the birth control company when she got pregnant with me...love you too mom.
I just ate nachos topless with a fork. Live with meeee
But you wanna know what the sadest part is? I had to smoke on the way back home cause my mom would be suspicious if I wasn't high after I was supposedly hanging out with you.
we are sitting in a kindergarden classroom alone chugging beer. look at our lives. look at our choices.
thanks for the bloody nose. you probably dont remember, i'm not mad.. only because your boobs are to blame
That's the last time you suggest we can get our tab wiped by out-drinking the bartender.
It was my card, so what do you care that you lost?
Is your card paying for my plan b?
I'd like to say yes, but I nearly lost my shit when I assumed there was no back to my house. I am not strong enough for hallucinations.
I wonder what blackout Alex would think of her?
probably "functioning vagina, must touch"
honestly i just want a cigarette and someone to go down on me... are you interested in helping with either of those
You ever just wake up and decide, today I'm going to eat a whole bag of fritos and a tub of cream cheese
I will keep you posted and someday if we daydrink teach you how to do a footjob
Dying on my bathroom floor at 7 am, I would rather be eaten by a shark right now
this strobe light makes my body turn on and off
Neighbor just came over and asked if I had anything to clean blood out of carpet... it's definitely time to move.
Randomize
