My T9 Word has dryhumped saved but I can't even get it to figure out bbq.
Im so hungover that my 6 year old cousine made me aspirine and coffee out of playdoh...
Like reprimanding the wall for "sneaking up on me" drunk
I'm taking her home. She just told a 90 yo woman in a packers hat to "suck her cock".
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
What is the appropriate way to inform him that I am TOTALLY down for break up sex?
Indeed. The kind of morning where puking in someone's shoes is not frowned upon
I've been timing it. He's been showering alone for 33 minutes. 4 minutes ago, he said "truth or dare." haven't heard anything since.
She face-timed me on the toilet. My dick is never going to recover from that.
Just so you know, classy bitches change the morning after in a CVS bathroom.
My heart is swelling with pride right now. I fucking love you.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
There is a video recording of my birth. I have seen it. It is terrifying.
do you remember your solution to not spill your drinks last night? .. Shots, that way you wouldnt have time to spill them. i love your drunken logic haha
I'd cum everywhere if I could have chicken nuggets right now
Decided to stay in tonight. Completely sober. Just got two drunken booty calls within 5 minutes of each other. This is my life.
I wasn’t trying to be creepy it just happened
I’m beginning to think that’s your defining personality trait.
Do u believe in the possibility of big foot?
You high??
Randomize