Dude, I don't think I'll ever be able to find a girl for me...
Is this the gay conversation?
don't go back without me... they'll know i'm pooping.
coke and sex party at dan's
im watching greys anatomy with megan...
wha-pishhh
there should be a rule against ugly people hooking up.
yeah...but then what would the ugly people do? hook up with pretty people? yeahhh..don't see that happening in the near future. plus i'm not okay with that.
They were done having sex when I went to the room. They had that look on their faces.
Disappointment?
I need moral support for this bender
Waking up with a sore back because you put the team on it for jager pong all night
We found her on the doorstep. Just layin down going, "I made it home!! Aren't you proud??!"
I wish my bank account would intervene on my life choices.. $200+ in alcohol in 2 weeks and a $40 McDonald's bill is a cry for help.
Everyone here is taking crazy amounts of mescaline and I'm just over here like hey have you tried the pretzel rolls mmm
I am a figure skater. You should know better than to let me get drunk near any patches of ice during Olympics season.
I woke up with a bunch of jolly ranchers and an eight ball in my purse. Successful
It's alright. I'm just trying to make her realize you're not good enough for her.
woke up on my floor using my jeans i wore out as a pillow
haha i wouldn't expect any less of you
your mission the party friday: cockblock me at ALL costs. I've cheated on my boyfriend twice. I feel like three times would be crossing some sort of line...
and no, I don't care how how hot he is
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