Yo I'm just eating dinner now. U ready to go out?
Ya ya. Where you eating?
Cereal and beer. U kno u want in.
you ever feel like there is a sober person insided you pointing and laughing....?
He poured all of the vodka into the sweet tea and said that tomorrow it would be called 'surprise drunk.' then we had sex.
There is a different car in my driveway. Have no clue how I got home.
There should be a rule.......that if you have a small penis you must wear a hat with propellers on it so you can fly the hell off the planet.
So hungover. Walked into room and poached their catering before realized in wrong place. Scowled and ate it anyway
Whatever. I am not explaining the physics of my dick slapping.
Maybe it's because I walked straight up to that shelf of vodka with a look of determination that said "I mean business".
I usually have to have a cart! If that doesn't say "I mean business" then I don't know what does
Can't feel body but making pizza rolls
We almost ended up sober because of u!!
I paper cut my nipple reading mail topless
the bucket list is making me question my morals...and sexuality
So were driving two hours to go to a club and Charles packed me a sippy cup full of tequila. He thinks of everything!
also. when i get a car, the amount of space there is for sex WILL be a huge deciding factor.
We've been together for 10 months. These next 2 may be a deal breaker. He has not met the summertime version of me that is so hungover today that I cancelled a meeting with my boss right after she sent me an appreciation note saying I have great work ethic. I have her fooled.
Randomize