It was awkward until we both realized our obsessions with harry potter and sangrias were the same. Now were in love.
You need tk get a life and stop texting me about fictional characters. I don't give a shit.
coke and sex party at dan's
im watching greys anatomy with megan...
wha-pishhh
You realize we can hear you jacking off in your room, right?
I like it rough
I just gave head in the laundry room on campus. He said it was one of the best moments in all of history. Take that, neil armstrong.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
I just put a tampon in while driving. Don't tell me I don't got skills.
Don't EVER smell your tampon
The bride and groom wore the Batman masks I brought. Best wedding ever.
I just farted a soft, gentle fart and it made me think of the eye puff glaucoma test at the eye dr. I hope that's not fart air they use for those. And yes, I'm texting you from the toilet and yes again, I'm high.
Okay hun. Well my neighbors haven't called the cops yet so I think we're good. No more burning in the yard.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
Oh my god I found my bf's erotica
OH MY GOD HE WROTE THIS EROTICA.
OH MY GOD THIS IS GOOD EROTICA.
I hope you get stoned and think that you're a seal in shark infested waters
Sorry, that was mean and I didn't mean it. I'm just mad at condoms
Be safe. If you have intercourse with a boy use so many condoms this his penis is no longer recognizable.
Was reaching for my vibrator this morning out of my nightstand and strained my neck muscle. I'm getting so old.
You have a full penis tattoo of a cobra fighting a mongoose, don't you?
Randomize