i'm pretty sure you said "blowjob marathon" lastnight
i totally said that
he puts the penis in happiness.
Did we use protection last night?
Um, no...keep in touch, okay?
there are certain things about getting into a cab to go home at 630 am that make me feel like a prostitute.
So he handed us the weed then asked us if we needed any papers. And she goes "i dont know what that means, do we need to sign something?"
I thought about farting is his face when he was going down on me last nite.
I wonder if i could put a dildo on my bike seat to encourage me to exercise.
It's 2:30 on a Friday afternoon. It's snowing and must be about 20 degrees outside. I'm sitting in this class with 300 people using up every ounce of energy and willpower not to puke all over the girl in front of me. This has got to stop.
I found your wallet in my underwear drawer......... Don't worry I don't plan on asking any questions
DR UNK TOWN USA
TEAM USA GO AMERICA
Because it was 5am and I had a shitty mixed drink and I was threatening to put my balls in your face.
Not the worst first impression I've experienced.
Let's get matching tattoos, something that resembles our friendship
A tequila worm?
The appetizer at the dinner I went to tonight was Klonopin and a Bloody Mary.
I finally broke my dry spell. I did it. D-do-da-Dora.
the only thing she has in her apt so far is toilet paper and shot glasses. you can see where the priorities lie.
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