i cvme to yuor rooom...wherer are youf?
please be gone before i get back
Ah that type of Dick. I think my phones trying to make me less of a whore by capitalizing Dick. That way it looks like I'm talking about a dude not penis
i've noticed that whenever i have to ask myself "would i be doing this if i was sober?" the answer is probably no.
I'm making a conscious effort to limit my spending at the bars...i wrote "FOR CAB ONLY" on a $20 last night
Just got blown on the bus in front of abot 20 ppl. Lots of high fives.
I truly believe that the solid foundation of any healthy relationship is a drunken one night stand so I can just get all the nasty shit out on the table
Well look at it this way, if he should happen to get into a terrible accident within the next 2 days, its okay.. i have his dental records on my ass cheek.
I'm wearing cowboy boots and showing way too much cleavage to be in a place with no jaeger.
I have a diplomatic trade for you. My pants for your rum. Tomorrow?
Dollar Store pregnancy tests. For when you sorta wanta know.
They have marijuana tests too!
Pride is not for the college student young Padawan. Tequila is for the college student.
His dick is the size of my forearm. Would it be rude to ask to take a comparison photo after sex?
She has no problem going ass to mouth, but won't eat the pizza crust. I don't get it.
I think my moral compass just broke
Dude, the worst part is I can't even pretend it didn't happen because she posted a video of it on Facebook.
Randomize
