playing new game: drink everytime u see someone at the beach with a tramp stamp, double if u guess it before u see it, triple for male tramp stamps
warning: blackouts possible when playing in ocean city or anywhere in new jersey
Maryland truck stops are full of people with killer mustaches
Everything was going good until she wanted to update her status...You forgot to close pterodactyl porn from this morning. Clothes went back on.
thank you for introducing me to everyone on chat roulette as I was passed out.
I hope the dean has a raincoat on because I'm prolly gonna throw up on him when I get my degree
I saw someone get arrested while I was moving out...this has to be a good sign.
Like I had no idea he knew how to play girls the way he played me. His major is chemistry for christ's sake.
I am about to embark upon a south Boston wedding....
Hydrate.
Can we please start going to the gym before I accidentally kill someone via explosive fat girl pants button accident
The staples of my diet are Labatt Blue, Xanax, and brick cheese.
I should have never moved out...
Never in a million years thought I would have to put jello shot recipe/equation into an excel spreadsheet
Haha I wasn't coming anyway. I'm watching Snow White and don't want to put pants back on. Those are completely unrelated. Have a good night.
So I've already made 5 bad decisions today, wyd?
you going clubbing tonight?
well its tuesday isnt it
They should invent shampoo and conditioner for sex hair. I would buy all the travel size ones.
Randomize
