I'm pretty sure there's seven mailboxes in the bathtub...
you win again, gameday.
i just sold a bong and some oregano to fifth graders for sixty dollars. doing something tonight?
Just put a picture of dead dolphins on her wall...told her the oil spill was her fault.
He was such a tease, he pulled out his dick, let me touch it then put it away
This summer isn't about fun. We have to train our livers to survive the next four years.
I was galloping around pretending to give birth to pbrs. I could have used a mask.
Depending on which video of him streaking you watch, you can see me passed out in the front row.
The porch is breathing.
STAY OUT OF MY SHROOMS YOU CUNT
Well if your hearts not big enough, your penis certainly is. Just have a threesome
i put frozen meatballs in my drink thinking they were ice cubes and I'm vegetarian wtf
I feel bad for her. If you sacrifice and have a chubby husband I feel that you assume he's not going to cheat on you....
Im goin to jail bro ill talk to u sun
DRUNK COOKIES
Are you drunk or are the cookies drunk or are these cookies that get you drunk?
Yes
my dad just built a flame thrower.. you should probably get here
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