i fell asleep last night with fifteen animal crackers in my mouth. rock bottom dude.
Seius question. Does a penis floar when ina baht? Must find out.
In between rounds of sex, you stopped and did drunken handstand push-ups.
So question... If I'm sexting with uncircumcised guy, do I have to add *then i gently pull your foreskin down*?
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
my cockatiel has aquired a taste for beer. I should not be allowed to own exotic pets.
I just used Bacardi to dry out poison ivy.
He's so in love with you that you could fuck a blood relative and he'd be like "I just want you to be happy"
Willing booties have sort of a tractor beam for me.
He's a Republican and an Ohio State fan idk how far this can go.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
look when god gives you a dick that good for his son's birthday you don't question it
Currently doing the walk of shame out of some random girls house with my boyfriend. Talk about relationship goals.
Welcome to your 30’s, where every one night stand is most likely with someone’s father
when ur drunk laser tag is all fun n games. try it high and all of the aliens in the galaxy want you dead.
You think my vibrator will be okay in the dishwasher?
Santi's no longer allowed to buy booze in my lane. Last thing I need is a midlife crisis looking at his Id again.
Randomize