Is that you in the white hat?
Fine suit yourself
I need to take "lollipop" off of every single one of my playlists cause it makes me wanna suck dick.
I got head to The Nanny. Officially gay.
He only had napkins in the bathroom... no toilet paper. If I fuck him, am I settling?
Jameson and I invented street rugby last night. Yeah
Maybe we could get a groupon for vasectomy. I'm game.
I will be going to walgreens soon.. nothing says trainwreck like pickin up a scrip for xanax at 2am drunk..
If you find my purse on your yacht please call me - girl you slept with after yacht party
You have ruined sex with him for me. Now all I think is "boy scout" and I want to go home
I have no idea what those words in that order meant, but if you go to Florida send me pics of strippers
steve's beating me 4-2 in our "sexually confusing straight people" competition. steve is a wizard. this is not a drill.
you said something about joining a k-pop band before passing out topless on the trampoline.
Ugh, I should just give up, and fuck him in a parking lot, and shave my head and walk naked through the streets of King's Landing.
do you remember yelling out "insecurity makes my pussy dry!" unnecessarily loud at the bar?
How you doing tonight? I got my butthole licked so i cant complain.
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