After she threw up on my floor she started singing "this is why I'm hot."
Remember when you tried to pay that stripper to cry on stage?
Well he has a girlfriend. So I told him that I wanted to have sex way more than I wanted to be a decent human being.
Her inability to understand the word "moderation" is the achille's heel of an otherwise perfect human
They sat me on college avenue with a puke bucket and people were mistakenly throwing change in it. Got me enough money take a cab back to my apartment.
I convinced every single one of my cousins to bring me a glass of wine. I was the alcoholic queen and they were my subjects.
Just puke out the sadness. Like a fuckin dragon.
So if I get kidnapped from my office and go missing for a few days does that count against my vacation days and do I still get paid?
I think I have to break up with him. I just cried, not moaned, screamed, etc, cried, with tears of sadness and disappointment when I came.
It was literally 8 o'clock in the morning. His horniness knows no bounds.
Congratulations, you have turned my vagina into a garden hose.
I don't know how guys can take themselves seriously when they see themselves naked
I got my period during my acid trip. It was weird.
You don't know the capacity of my vagina
Well, I hope you're having fun. I'm just gonna lay here and wait for death - shouldn't be long now.
Randomize
