I'm 3 blocks south of you watching drag queens.
my roommate just caught me washing a dildo in the sink.
I brought my laptop into the bathroom so I can facebook while vomiting. New low?
No, drunk sperm still make babies.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
i get tired of guys telling me there married or they have a girlfriend. they act like it concerns or matters to me
He tagged himself in all of my pictures so he would get a notification if someone commented on it.
Restraining orders are what college is about.
I woke up and we were making out. So the good news is that after two years off the market, I haven't lost a step. I'm picking up girls in my sleep now.
My heart is having a hard time convincing my vagina he's not worth it.
I'm at the point where I'm gonna write in my mothers bday card. Happy birthday. Please stop having sex with the door open.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
I don't think I will ever be as happy about anything as this man next to me on the bus eating Taco Bell.
He gave me the award for most entertaining blow job. That should count for something.
I'm having post-experience "why didn't I fuck her in a public bathroom" regrets
Serious question: does drunken cyber sex with a stranger on omegle count as cheating???
Just got drunk at the Cheesecake Factory again. Made me think of you.
That's the nicest thing anyone's ever said to me.
If he thinks I'm canceling my orgy to coddle his stupid fucking behavior, he has another thing coming
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