i love marijuana more then i could love a human baby.
As of tonight I have officially had sex during every Disney movie.
im pretty sure thats the first step to being a pedafile
halloween is SO much better on drugs, why didn't anyone let us know about this when we were kids
I incognito puked under the VIP table. Did Jersey proud.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
Unless you consider jello shots food the answer is no there is no dinner here. When u get food get more wine too tired of you coming over drinking all my booze and destroying my vagina
I just got a nosebleed on a date at the cheesecake factory...
just run out of the bathroom with blood gushing down your face and scream "ITS IN THE CHEESECAKE!!!!!"
pretty sure I just came the closest to throwing up in my pants that I'm ever gonna get. I'd like to thank the academy and the hangover thatt I hope actually kills me in the morning.
Hypothetical Question: Would you take a cougar bullet for me?
Jk probs not coming. Tequila
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
he fucked me while wearing his "Reagan Bush '84" tank and my inner democrat has never been more disappointed
Update: He still has devil magic genitals.
I let a 30 year old guitar player that works at a call center go down on me in his backseat last night
Let me atleast have my coffee before you start talking about your penis
There were a lot of gay moments in between the Strippers and coke
The strippers who live across the street set up a decently professional stage on their front balcony and a banner for a go fund me... I think we're gonna get a show.
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