that's when I learned why R Kelly peed on that bitch
her voice honestly makes me want to vomit. i have springsteen cranked up all the way.
I just saw the dad from "Little People Big World" at the airport. I chased him down and congratulated him for beating the DUI.
I'm not ready for the Pike bikes to move back in to town it was wonderful seeing that sorority house empty all summer
... I'm KD
I just took went to the bathroom and it smelt like blue curococo... I didn't flush yet so head on up if you wanna know what a good night smells like.
They just both started mumbling "i cant go home like this" "it's all over my face" "do you have extra pants?"
Some are given great drunkenness. Others have great drunkenness thrust upon them, in the form of ice storms.
Do you remember trying to use a pencil, pen, and sunglasses as your second form of ID at the bar when they wouldn't let you in last night?
wine lets you be on time to class apparently
This is a dangerous realization
I've got a permanent seat at the "Girls who eat their feelings" table this weekend.
i will not be out-irished. not this night. if i don't wake up tomorrow handcuffed to a hospital bed, i have failed my ancestors.
What is my life coming to that I have to cross state lines to get laid?
She said "we just have chemistry" ... I wanted to say "no, you just have a vagina."
I called him the wrong name all night, yet I still got a ride home from the party and hooked up with the guy. I'm irresistible.
Jenna is yelling bc of the condom wrappers and cum stains. This is the 3rd and last time you have sex in my roommates bed.
Randomize
