And Anthony pissed on himself at the strip club
after everytime she pucked, she insisted on us all giving her high fives
Please stop sending me picture messages of your shit. Seriously. I don't care if it looks like popcorn chicken.
do you remember putting condoms over both your hands and asking me if your fists would be too big.
Dating my ex's drug dealer.. best. revenge. ever.
It's cold our but I feel like a very blazed penguin
Want to come to my BBQ and Blow party?
Can we put your name for the shipping address for penis ice luge?
Matt says that there are strip club auditions in our living room and he'd like you to audition.
Gonna open a taco bell in colorado. Millions bro.
Black out Jordan is making huge strides. I didn't even pee on anyone or anything last night.
The last thing I remember is goading each other into a vodka-chugging competition.
Something tells me tonight will end with me wearing my pants on my head again.
Swear on my life the dude next to us just ordered a pizza and I will fight to the death for a slice
i woke up this morning wearing my pants as a scarf and my shirt as a daiper, my boyfriends contact name in my phone is "human sacrifice" and yours is "i like eggs"....can someone please tell me what happened last night
Randomize
