It was just pointed out to me in a meeting that there is a lipstick stain on my crotch.
Where are you???
With some dude on the way to his house to blaze
You went back to a stranger's house????
He isn't a stranger...he used to be on kids, inc.
I love LA.
don't go back without me... they'll know i'm pooping.
Just erased 'masturbate' from my mental To-Do list because I've got too much stuff to do. I hate adulthood
I just peed behind the dumpster and dedicated it to you. Can i call u?
To my wonderful winter break booty calls: thank you for making this holiday season enjoyable. I look forward to seeing you boys again this summer.
I really want to lead this Amish guy into temptation
I knew as soon as he opened a beer with his teeth to shotgun it that I was going to sleep with him. I'm never going home.
There was a pumpkin carving contest and we carved a very realistic dick about to penetrate a vagina. Our Christian Youth hosts were not happy.
We have so much sex to catch up on
the other day i was so high i found pages and pages of pictures of HD hamburgers and patriotic music. bong rips for merica.
We are gonna have a bake sale and the preceded will go towards the abortion
Just beer bonged through a snorkel, add that to the list
I fucked his roommate. And that roommate's best friend. And my roommate. And my roommate's old roommate.
i'm bowing down, but slow your roll.
I fished a Couples Masturbation DVD out of somebody’s trash and kept it. That’s how desperate I am.
Randomize
