so... thinking about masturbating finally
taking the losers way out I see
i just realized that im half way to my goal of puking in every single toilet on our floor
maybe i'll make good life choices and keep my legs closed. periodically txt me friday and saturday night saying "baby carrot round 2" that should stop me.
I realize now that I left my pants on that table in the downstairs bathroom at you house on Tuesday....
Got into the physics lab with my student id, hooked up over break when school was closed. I regret no payments for tuition.
Don't make it weird, I don't think about you when I'm climaxing, it's just that I see you rooting me on.
We were so drunk that when I broke the bottom off a pint glass we decided to make it into a candle holder. How does that happen?!
My stalker sent me an erotic poem. Who knew anyone could find a way to rhyme birth and girth so eloquently?
That bottle of wine took a part of my soul with it.
So we broke my sobriety. Played life size childhood games. Broke into a cold hot tub and got laid. I think this is BFF quality!
I'm serious. I have boob tassles if this is an exchange thing.
I mean honestly, what would you have done?
Not screw her in the church house?
No I did a yoga dvd and hit my ex up via email for some pot in exchange for his mail.
He gave me an orgasim so fantastic that I had an asthma attack.
They are like the regular squirrels and we are flying squirrels
Randomize
