Me too ba-by. I wanna bite your ear lobes they are so fat.
i just broke my key off in the door of my house because the engine wasnt starting
I need a booty call who doesn't know my boyfriend or my friends.
He yelled IN THE FACE!! while cumming on my face.
kinda considering buying a life alert for sophmore year
I smoked a bowl while he ate me out, you need to change your major to match making asap. You are a guru of love.
My clit ring got caught in his beard. Never. Again.
Ok cuz s'mores night just turned into pina colada after noon and it will be mas fun
In the pie chart of my life, she is a huge part of why I drink.
Besides you're a Tennessee fan and it'd be against my religion to have your penis inside me today.
Jesus, I think this onesie was designed to keep me from masturbating.
I feel like a girl who eats her problems away with fast food.
When all else fails, you can always look down at your enormous penis.
I need you to ship me a penis cookie care package.
I say I'm working from home on conference call days, but really I just mute the phone, put that shit on speaker so I can hear what's going on, and let Marcus fuck my brains out.
the good news is I finally used my captain america waffle maker to make captain america waffles
Randomize
