smell my finger.
He came all over my face... then said "YOU HAVE BEEN ROBBED!"
What's this douchebags name?
Rob...
we fucked while he was on the clock. He didnt even take off his bullet proof vest. Dont tell me thats not bad ass.
I would rather deep fry my own cock while it's still attached to me than have his life.
You have to sext the same way you right a resume, you can only use active verbs
Don't pretend you don't want to dance on the edge of overdose all three nights
I feel like my body was put in a dryer with rocks set on permanent press.
GDI YOU HAVE THE GOD OF FUCKING THUNDER'S NUDES AND YOU DIDN'T SHARE
i asked my neighbor to open a bottle of vodka once and then we slept together
And I'm laying here struggling with the notion that I need to put pants on.
He sent me a dick pic. I am fighting the urge to send him a "sorry for your loss" card.
Honestly my life is shambles over a married man who looked like a fuckin NERD ON HIS WEDDING DAY
I sent him home with blood on his fingers and shame in his heart.
I'm not fucking you with a Stormtrooper helmet on!
I put him in the supply closet, used the copy paper to build a fort around him and his wheelchair, then he fucked me in the fort.
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