If it were my dying wish, would you come over 2nite 2 save me?:):):) wana come anyways?
no, there's no challenge. I live a humble lifestyle out of virtue.
You wear Armani Exchange.
Ps. The strap-on in the pic i sent you last night was not mine. Just wanted to clear that up.
if by "adventure" you actually mean "getting ridiculously high and shaving our legs," then yes.
What's standard gratutity for someone having a miscarriage on stage at a strip club? It's important.
Ps there is nothing more humbling in the world than havin to watch cheaper by the dozen on the waiting room tv while getting the morning after pill at the drs. Nothing
Hi. This might be awkward, but I met you on saturday at about 330 am. I have to admit I don't remember your name, what we talked about, or various details of how I got home. What I do remember is that I was invested enough in getting your number to ask my cab driver for a pen to write it down since my phone was dead. So do you want to meet, soberer, some time?
Hey bro I think you got the wrong number I'm a dude
Okay I take that back some girl just said pussy sweat. Get me outta here
You think you know everything because you're wearing a sweater
I also made him write a nonfiction romance novel about what happened and to give it to me when the time was right
I puked in the back of my mom's new car because I had too much to drink at Chilis. I think I just hit rock bottom.
He stole my heart. I stole his identity.
I sent him a tex saying, "I thought my intentions were clear" drunk me has some balls.
I never thought I'd end up with a prison pen pal through tinder
So I have three weeks to get rid of his girlfriend and fuck him senseless before he goes to jail
Randomize
