I don't think ill make it tonight the floor wont let me walk
Could you imagine if a Skynet machine combination of Bob Ross and Chuck Norris were built? It would rule the universe with a soft spoken fan brush of kung fu dominance
It would be truly incredible. I hope we are blessed with this being in our lifetime.
That adds atleast one bjs worth of awkward sexual tension between us.
Just made out with the bride... She was still in her dress & I was still in my bridesmaid dress, how's that for an album picture?!?
he was spitting whole peanuts projectile out of his mouth at the waitresses as they walked by and then yelled across the restaurant that he had "no problem kicking any of their asses"
I just listened to "Eye of the Tiger" and did 5 shots to prep going over to see him.
N.C. cops just used a megaphone to tell me I have a slutty outfit. My life is complete.
Alright, text me when you get close. I've got a mustache and I'm ready to get my day drunk on.
just once I'd like to not pass out before we leave the designated pre-drinking place
Still pimpin that dick in the cornfields. Now it's just transferred to the local bar.
On your day off do you wanna get wine drunk and take a few episodes of Jerry Springer way too seriously with me?
His dick isn't even good enough to be this much of an asshole
you know my pussy doesn't know between good and evil
I still dont see how i drunkenly impressed your mom
high I am. I am yoda. Yoda I am
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