I feel like Captain Hook just gave me a pap smear.
Is there a nice way of saying 'touch my penis or i dont really wanna hangout"?
he yelled 'rock me amadeus!' when he came
i love that song!
NOT THE POINT
APPARENTLY giving your friend one of your shoes so that you avoid the no shoes no service rule makes you drunk...
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
There was a suspicious looking plate that suggests I may have eaten salad with gravy
Everyone is hammered wasted already...young, old, the dying, babies...we got them all
he ran through my sliding door
in his defense that door gets complicated after 10 beers
How are ur friends?
One is peeing in the grass and the other is asleep under the stairs. Fuck them I'm sleeping in the car
You screamed "I NEED TO GET THE WHOLE SET!" and then proceeded to try touching everyone's balls in the room
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
It's hard to hold down the snapchat button for video while thrusting. Sorry if the cinematography wasn't Oscar-worthy.
It's something I can't competently describe without making sex sounds.
What's Spanish for "I shouldn't have worn these underwear to work?"
I want to buy weed from this guy on Tinder but I'm not sure I should trust him...but it's free delivery
Same encounter she body slammed me to the floor and than humped me
90% sure I just opened a snapchat of you in a fuzzy bathrobe next to your ceiling collapsing
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