im officially scared..,i finally realized who my boyfriend reminds me of! spencer pratt
i would really appreciate it if you would stop texting my girlfriend.
i would really appreciate it if you would stop cock blocking me.
Just dunked an oreo in a white russian. Trying to think of a better experience in my life and failing.
Drinking wine. Reading twilight. On a Friday night. Biggest loser contest. First Place.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
I am too drunk to make real decisions. I had pop rocks all over my ass earlier. This is not a joke.
my resolution for 2011 is to fuck him whenever he wants it. this year I'm going above and beyond the call of booty.
The world is my kaleidiscope. I see whatever the alcohol wants me to.
Just you wait I'll be crying and puking everywhere in no time
Omg, you would have loved the guy I almost hit with my car tonight
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now Heβs Upset Because People Told His Mom
I felt guilty, it was so good!
Guilty? Oh great, I give the Jewish mother-in-law of blowjobs.
Yess he was literally so drunk that like at one point I'm pretty sure he thought it was hard and in when neither were true :/ haha
Apparently I was walking around with a slice of bread and wine saying, "Jesus would have wanted this." π ππ·
Wait what do you mean I BOUGHT A FUCKING HORSE LAST NIGHT?!?!
the cops drove by and you were on your back in the middle of the side walk with your arms and legs in the air yelling that you were a dead bug .
I am so so sorry I bit your butt last night. Twice.
Randomize