is it cool if i come over and use your computer?
what happened to yours?
i got a little to drunk last night and threw up on it...then i tried to wash it off under the sink.
Journey is playing on the radio....I think it is a sign I am going to pass my drug test
Report just came out that Tim Tebow is a virgin but I have proof he is not. He's bent Florida State over the last four years in a row.
I just blindly shoved it in. I'm still not sure which hole I got.
He was rambling about life and dignity and happiness. but all i kept thinking was PENIS. YOU HAVE A PENIS. I CAN SHOW YOU WHERE TO PUT THAT PENIS.
Upon further investigation it turns out it wasn't blood, but chocolate frosting from the cupcake I shoved in my pocket to "save for later"
WHY DO I WANT TO FUCK EVERY GUY THAT BREATHES
if I open my eyes, my head will explode. that hungover.
when I came to get Jamie there was a cop standing outside with her, made me roll down my window to tell me "she's got to go cause she won't keep her shirt buttoned"
THIS IS A FLATMATE WARNING! The white powder next to sink is washing powder I spilled and is not meant for human comsumption. I repeat- do not digest, snort or smoke the white powder next to the sink!!!!
i have to vacuum my washing machine now, asshole
I am actually offended he hasn't asked me to sleep with him yet to get better grades...I wanted the whole college experience.
Egg rolls and cum. Not my worst snack.
I like to send nudes ok? If that's my biggest flaw I think I'm ok
Are you sure you found YOUR underwear?
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