when I'm not with you everything just looks like crayon scribble
So, just so you know... Your vasectomy worked.
bonus
Then he told me I had the most beautiful looking vulva
I wonder if i passed any courses from last semester
She looked at me and said there is a 90% chance I am going to puke in the next 10 minutes. 10 minutes later she is in jack in the box throwing up. She has amazing timing.
He burnt a smiley face into the screen with a cigarette, peed in my tub and then tried to take off his pants. tried...
Aw lol. Sounds like my masturbation injury last year
Everytime Our professor said "penis fencing" in class today we took shots.
I just want my birth control to stop making me feel like I'm watching baby seals get clubbed to death any time anything even remotely unpleasant happens lol
Well yes he stayed. He brought Guiness, them he shaved me. It's a long, but beautiful story.
Nope we are at the ER my brothers crazyass neighbor kinda stabbed him in the neck. He's gonna be fine.
I was a little curious what "unspeakable" things he could possibly do to my feet
He just used the word frick. Is that a possible red flag?
Plus he is a pilot so I could give him flight dome
My dad told me I would need to be my mom's DD tonight. So, that's how my Easter weekend is going down.
Randomize