lol whn u cming hre I nd 2 c ur fce
IF YOU TEXT ME ONE MORE SHORTENED VERSION OF A WORD, THE ONLY THING YOU'LL SEE IS MY FIST IN YOUR FACE.
I'm like a new puppy, everybody wants to touch me
ofcourse shes the first one pregnant. wasnt she the one who asked the middle school health teacher how many calories are in sperm?
i just made my mom cry by blowing spit bubbles.
Now would be a great time to stop wondering " Who let the dogs out" and go to sleep
What if we had a smart house and we could just say "baked" and it would rain donuts?
You were spitting chewed up pretzle into my hands telling me to hold it for you.
EARTHQUAKE STATUS DRINKING GAME
We still need to grow old, buy a house, and drink 40's while wearing old people sunglasses, staring at the young studs mowing our lawn.
They wouldn't serve more then two Shots per person, so you grabbed a group of strangers and said u werre buying them all shots, then proceeded to drink all of them.
Apparently my face was in the trashcan and in between throw ups I was screaming LOS DIABLOS. I woke up this morning with a bird flying around my room. Nobody seems as concerned as I am.
Jake and I will do a protection ritual for ur dick I don't know where she has been
So, I'm tripsitting Ruben cause he's on LSD, and he's starting to eat the chair because 'it is evil' according to him... I can't choose: should I stop him or film it?
I'm pretty sure he's playing the harmonica in my shower right now. I just really need to pee.
EXCEPT MY COUSIN SAW MY SEX TAPE!
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