the crunchwrap supreme is the def leppard of the taco bell menu
which is why it's clearly superior
I love how girls just decide that guys who don't like them must be gay
I do the same thing. If a girl doesn't like me...I am like, "i must be gay"
After she threw up on my floor she started singing "this is why I'm hot."
dude they were twins that means they were both only 17
We just got home. I got some malt liqour and a lottery ticket so I'm really doing a lot with my life right now
Bartending School is so much more enjoyable now that I realized I was in rehab at this time last year.
My ex best friend's ex fuck buddy is visiting. There was no other option but day drinking.
In hindsight, the torn ligament in my knee is probably the fault of the ginbucket and jager bombs starting at 3pm. I guess I'll stop blaming it on you.
At least I look tastefully trashed. My nipples are hidden and I'm standing up.
When i left he was drinking an entire pot of coffee out of the pot with a straw. It's safe to say he's using a personal day
I'm running on jager fumes right now. It's like I put diesel in a prius and said fuck it.
Are you still going to come over for your post Alcoholics Anonymous beer?
Building a door into the garage so when I bring girls home my mom doesn't wake up.
Pathetic yet considerate
I really don't know how I went from having a few drinks to waging war against ghosts in my apartment but here we are
We fucked to Bonnie Tyler in my car. He's the one.
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