so this carnie looked at me and said "the ride in my pants is funner." i wet myself.
The weather is perfect in Seattle right now. Warm enough for girls to not wear bras, but cold enough for me to see them nipping out in the shade.
took 5 apple pie shots. caution: flames. not digestable.
2 v-cards in one night. impossible is nothing.
i only understood the part that said mucho orgasmos
I'm at the bar and they've turned up lady gaga to cover the sound of the fire alarm.
Just to give you a heads up, I am going home with your ex-boyfriend.... You can't be mad because he was my ex-boyfriend first
i just spent 10 minutes talking to the lady who works at taco bell about my romantic situation.
So drunk. Washed my hair un pancheros sink cus I was so hot.
You're lucky I'm tired or I'd take a pic of me mounting a reindeer yard decoration
He just whispered "doors are weird" and then laughed so hard he fell down the stairs.
are we fucking for lunch or am I using my vibrator ?
I just bought a 1/4 oz of pot from a coworker who's old enough to be my grandfather...I'm never leaving Portland.
I just noticed that pic of your cock has a Christmas tree in the background. It's July.
It wasn't until I lost my earring that I realized "I've been here before". Turns out we fucked a year ago. We've decided to make it a tradition.
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