i want tt clbm rinabw nd ride uncrn
what?
i wnt tto climb a rainboww and ride a unicornnnnnnnnn
i'm officially boycotting relationships. hello random hook ups and treating men like meat.
I think my plan to not drink this week was just ruined by my mothers discovery of the chat function on facebook
Eventually evolution will just give us a better liver anyway, so our great great grandkids should THANK us for our binge drinking.
We listened to Rod Stewart Pandora and slow danced in the shower.
I pretty much threw up on him while he slept, I had one task today which was to wash the sheets that I threw up on and I turned them pink. I would leave me if I could
She kept sniffing my sweater and tried to guess what type of detergent I use.
I'm just planning on experiencing Disney as adult style as it gets. Drinking bloody mary's at dawn and telling all the kids waiting in lines how badly their future sucks and that Santa isn't real.
Guess who has two thumbs and broke her boyfriends dick?
I'm going to preface tonight by saying that I'm sorry for tequila, shopping carts, and having to chase me.
WHAT KIND OF DEALER ONLY WORKS FRI-SUN???
Ours, apparently.
Got my client divorced finally. He was even awarded the cat ashes. Yep I went to law school for this.
Do you think it would be weird to wear a shirt that says 'big fun small package' from an ex for a first date?
would it be awkward if i bring my husband?
only if i fuck you in the bathroom while he's paying the check
Who did he bring home?
Idk. But did you see her shoe choice by the stairs, I'm really not expecting anything great.
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