I JUST GOT MY PERIOD AND MY VISA FOR LONDON GOT APPROVED! BEST DAY EVER!
OMG! Someone dumped chocolate soft-serve in the bathroom! Dibs!
there's only 1 girl at Mount St Mary that's a virgin. the Mary statue standing outside
Do you think most people who work at an airport Chili's can pin point where their lives went wrong?
Went to use to bathroom and walked in on karaoke. Two girls singing "a whole new world" to each other in the shower. I'm gonna miss this place in the summer
And when we woke up we made beer pancakes. Great start to a family picture day.
This guy randomly got in our taxi, and has now collapsed on the sofa anouncing that he's staying the night.
You're not on my level until you shop at Petsmart for sex accessories.
im trying to look as sober as possible but i just poured orange juice and mayo into my milkshake.
Also the fuck cup must be buried with me
Try eating a sub blackout with your uncle. It's not easy ok
I'm pretty happy on the couch eating Popeyes and watching Cops so if I go over there you better have drugs left
My neighbor came out@4am in a pink nite gown n clotheslined a punk on a mo-ped w/her mop handle, then just walked back in her house like she just checked the mail. MILF 1 PUNK 0
11:30pm - Shots together. 12:15pm Shots together. 12:45pm Shots together. 9:30am Plan B's together.
So how often do you needs to see my tits today then?
Randomize
