How many times do you have to sleep with a guy before you get him to kiss you???
She just said she finds Tyler Perry funny... this is not going to work.
Who was that guy you went home with?
Hang on, I'm trying to ask his name right now.
Peter invited his little brother to smoke with us and he is trying so hard to pretend he's done it before. When he saw the weed he was like "hell yeah!" and everyone got completely silent and just looked at him
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
I get way too drunk to be trusted with family heirlooms
the cops who came hadnt heard yet. when we told them they sang the star spangled banner with us
He sent me an email apologizing for sleeping with her...and by that I mean he sent a picture of his dick to my school e-mail
He wasn't eating out, he was performing a hysterectomy without a license....should I be worried about my future family?
Bad breakup?
He posted a pic of me fully naked and smiling as he inserted a carrot into my vagina as my FB profile pic and then changed the PW, locking me out of my own account. So 500 of my closest friends, family, and coworkers now have that mental image of me on FB.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
He took a girl home tonight that he was trying to sell a fridge to. She wanted a fridge and got his dick. He's got a talent.
I ate an entire popcorn ball before bed. I know that because there is popcorn stuck to my poncho. Also. I'm still drunk. Also. I made out with a 19 year old. Also. #barnparties
Only you could successfully troll for dick at a Hillel bake sale.
She brought me back a blanket from Mexico, then we had sex on it
Are you going to eat tacos off the floor again?
We’ve got a propane heater on our back porch if you want to come over and eat a McRib in peace
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