I checked for jungle juice on Weight Watchers. they didn't have it.
worst lay ever....
as long as you cum, there is no bad sex
ya... thank god for condoms, I was able to fake it... I stand by my original statement
She forced me to throw up so it would "rejuvenate" me. It worked and then we took six more shots and did a keg stand. You know what I call that? Friendship.
he was wearing a tuxedo, i was naked...it's a long story.
i find it unbelievable that you didn't think it was necessary to intervene when i started letting people autograph my body with spray tan.
Post-shopping-cart-scooter-jousting victory fuck?
What time did you start drinking?
Maybe.
Maybe isn't a time...
don't you dare blame getting arrested on me. you sugested we play the penis game and we all know I'm a strong competitor
I just finished spraying the foam party off my pumps with a garden hose
She cracked her neck before the blowjob and I knew shit just got real.
Is selling savings bonds for acid money something a normal person does?
so he's a sleeptalker.
yeah??
"Mitochondria is the powerhouse of the cell" right in my ear. 2 am.
She acted like falling "up" the stairs was a fucking physics phenomenon. I call that Tuesday nights.
He has me blocked on facebook.... so I stalked him using my cats fan page.
Three cheers for handling my crush on my boss in an entirely reasonable manner, by having a threesome with my coworkers.
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