In line at the arbys drive thru on foot. Legendary.
You drank the expired grape juice because you were convinced it had fermented into wine...you have a problem.
what do people who dont have blackberrys do while they poop?
Sorry about all the noise last night. We were trying to break bottles by kicking soccer balls at them. If it's any consolation, there's shattered glass and blood all over my kitchen.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
Great, now justin bieber is gonna sing a song about chile
im using the astroglide sample u sent me as a bookmark for the book im using to write my midterm paper. i need to get laid. bad.
He yelled "HERE COMES THE WARMTH" before he pissed his pants. In front of the whole party.
My professor just gave everyone in the class extra credit... except for the kid wearing the Cubs hat
can we get together and have a vodka water gun fight? i need to get som intense excersise/alcohol
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
I did nothing besides stay sober all night, I walked home to find max naked knocking cups off the counter with his cock lol
I passed out drunk and Jane had created a picnic on my chest. I had chips and a hamburger laid out on my boobs. The only reason I woke up is she was trying to feed me too.
My radar detector detects ice cream trucks. I think it was made for stoners
Last night you made me help you pick the raisins out of a kashi bar and acted like it was the most important thing to ever happen to you or our friendship
sent a snap of my boobs out to my FWB his response was what happened to your other nipple ring.. how do I say it got ripped out by my other FWB last week without sounding like a slut
He could only go see Deadpool without his girl if he was black-out drunk... because spoilers. They're the perfect couple.
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