oh my god i am going to vomit. and little burgers wearing crowns are going to come out.
I just left during the middle of Chemistry to go throw up in the bathroom....and you laughed at my travel toothbrush.
Ridin mah bike see you on the moon
the cops didnt even say happy birthday to me :(
I'm not 100% on this, but I'm pretty sure I just accidently talked my way into a threesome.
Do they take checks?
Did you really just ask me if you could write a check for a DRUG DEAL?
I could tell by the Randy 'Machoman' Savage "hey brother" that you were beyond inebriated
We have to give a final comment in english, i think i might say "i learned it's a bad idea to make out with people in your classes who have girlfriends."
the point of no return was when you "drugged" his drink with glitter. face-planting on his dick was beyond.
I'm cheerleading for traffic. people are staring. Why am i the only high person on the way to class?
I'll send you the picture of you double fisting vodka bottles, grinding one guy and making out with another... Every girl wanted to be you.. You make me so proud!
I'll just have to do enough fangirling for the both of us. Nipples engaged.
You were so proud of your stupid "magic trick" but all you did was piss on the couch. don't talk to me for a few days.
friends are allowed to bang on New Years, I read it on the Internet somewhere.
WHY are you masturbating to hockey fights?
Randomize
