If I see one more duchette wearing Ed Hardy, but not actually having a real tattoo. I swear Im gonna shank a bitch.
i wouldn't be half as slutty if there were better things to do.
The hot Japanese girl in my class just said her "favorite sexy American actor is Nick Cage." That, I can work with.
I knew her barely 30 minutes before we got naked. This whole fraternity thing is starting to grow on me...
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
Just so we're on the same page, we cannot have been the first people to have ever thought about shooting that guy with crossbow
the theme of the baby shower is Nightmare On Prego Street
Also, I don't remember opening my gifts from my family. It was cool when I woke up with a new ihome.
You're in the clear; you and Andrew did not joint fingerbang that girl on the dance floor last night.
We are keeping it ultra classy drinking 40s and playing croquet with 90s rap blasting in the back ground
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You just stood up, raised your glass and said, "I'd like to thank the academy" then fell through a glass table. THAT'S why we cut you off.
It's not a real holiday until someone pees on you. Did someone pee on you?
We're Scorpios. We're like dogs rolling in whatever smells good to us.
Lost feeling in my face, my shoe and had a nose bleed. That's not wings. Fuck red bull.
And I must've sleep walked to the fridge cause when I woke up, there I was, balls deep in a fudge pop.
Can I just go naked and covered in glitter?
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