I woke up wearing no shirt sleeping next to a half-eaten grilled cheese.
Well did you call the grilled cheese yet? Or r u waiting the usual 3 days?
Classy? Dude, she fucked 3 guys as part of a scavenger hunt
And?
At the Phils game. My gay buddy just wanted up to a bunch of Mets fans and said "I'm gay, and even I think Mets fans are a bunch of fags." I love this fuckin town.
You know, if there were no such thing as marriage, i don't think porn would exist.
dude she's married.
so? a ring don't cover no holes.
So...AT&T finally added picture messaging for iPhone...bring on the tits!!!
She had a muffin-top while wearing a one piece bathing suit. Thats gotta break one of newton's laws or something
She started to tell me how she goes to a shrink, so I started thinking how to sneak out of her place, then she said part of it was for her sex addiction, long story short she's got her clit peirced n I just got laid
At least my fat-chick-ratio has not been that bad this semester ...
We sent off fireworks off in the taco bell drive through. They're taking it way too seriously.
I kinda feel like I was hit by a Prius. Just glad it's not bus status.
When I say "is it a bad idea to do Mollie before an 8hr shift tomorrow?" I dont want to hear the truth I want to hear you encouraging my bad decisions
mid-october of freshman year. goals have shifted from "no more guys on my floor" to "all the guys on my floor."
You took all of your clothes off and tried to seduce me and while trying to seduce me you decided you were too drunk and passed out.
For future reference: When the bouncer is approaching you to remove you from his bar, you don't respond by taking off your pants.
Randomize
