sent the pic of my tit to the wrong bbm chatroom
repeat this after me. period at the beach is better than baby at the beach. breathe. and: period at the beach is better than baby at the beach.
We'll probably be arrested for having a cheetah in our apartment anyway, so I say go for it.
Woke up this morning on my couch at 6am fully dressed including heels, holding half a corn dog. I called you last night when I was buying the corn dog from a street vendor, I think.
I am in love with you.
I just banged your sister. Thats what you get for takibg my lunch money in 2 grade, boom, boom fiyyaa powaa
How do people deal with hangovers? I literally want to eat my own face.
I bought a sword. Make the proper arrangements.
her dad gauges his nipple piercings.
I'm always drunk lately
Now I'm in a game of hide and seek in Sears
All i remember is you yelling at a stop sign and the rest is a blur
Just gave my thesis presentation, pretty sure I made out with the admissions woman last night.
I think it's important to not involve Bar Food in any near future decisions.
So her ex boyfriend came up a lot in conversation while I was fucking her. Is that weird?
Who the fuck has a conversation during sex?
I swear I'm going to walk in one day with you in a ballgag just masturbating feverishly
Well i can't stand the sound of my own crying
Lessons learned from last night: do not leave me drunk and alone with strippers and a credit card. Let's do whatever's cheaper.
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