??? When I first met her at the bar, she told me she was 23. After I bought her 3 shots of tequila, she told me she was really only 21. When we went back to my house, she said she was really only 19. She's still sleeping next to me butt naked. I'm afraid if she opens her mouth again I could be looking at 10 years.
Im drinking a beer thats called vuuve which is boobs in begian. I think my life is complete.
but i have a bet that her boyfriend is going to try and deflower her tonight so i better get a move on if i want to videotape it
she's a gynecology student. i don't know if my dick's ready for that kind of pressure.
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Today's dinner table topic: the probablity of my dad turning gay if he ever left my mom.
Go to petsmart and tell me if the dog trainer is the guy I slept with friday. Thanks.
Now accepting hypotheses about how i managed to get a bruise between my boobs....
A three fingered guy just showed up with fireworks and bourbon, tonight will be entertaining.
Plus my stomach has been speaking through my ass all day sending notes saying "fuck you" and "this is from your liver" or "i will kill you."
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She pushed me over. She offered me a shot from her tits. We're good now
My arms are still sore. Apparently, lube wrestling is the best workout ever.
Call me something sexy & ethnic. Like jasmine. But mystical too. Like Mermaid Jasmine. And throw Glitter somewhere in there too.
this hospital has no fireball
You were taking in your sleep. You were like Jess that's that animal we were talking about and you Hugged her feet
Willing booties have sort of a tractor beam for me.
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