I didn't shave. On purpose
k, so I just picked a four leaf clover, then saw my dads penis. Lucky? I think not.
her teeth looked like a whores toenails, i was too horrified to
I am SOOO high
tell me about your high
HUGE THUMBTACKS
you said the mailboxes were turning into babies and they started crawling away. then you cried and asked me how you were gonna get your college acceptance letters
she went to pee and i could hear her singing "Drip Drip Drop LIttle April Showers" from Bambi through the door.
Do you ever look back at facebook pics and say, "are those really guys I had sex with?"
I'm not gonna lie. having my legs shaved for me in the morning was a lovely surprise.
How bad does the situation have to be before its ok to attempt 'catastrophic event sex'?
I drunk-cried for all conjoined twins everywhere the other day.
I don't remember... but I heard a cop threatened to pepper spay my dick
Besides the one of you shaking your cock for 10sec that was one of the best snapchat's ever haha
Sex is always the answer.
Especially if the question is: what have I not had this year?
We took her out for fresh air and next thing we knew, she was stumbling around the backyard picking dead leaves up off the ground and putting them in her shirt to "save them".
I'm going to three dry weddings this month. I'm flashing three dry weddings this month
Randomize
