I think I just saw someone hide a body.
I now officially know the distance between my two boobs is one twizzler.
its like the voldemort of pregnancies, we don't talk about it
Quick question, how many times can you get chlamydia before your vagina just gives up and falls off?
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
Omg. Some dude is jacking off in Kelly's bathroom.
It's 4/20 of course I'm going to smoke in the portapotty and be ripped outta my mind at the lung cancer walk.
Yep if he's taking selfies he's probably on drugs again.
I cried over the lack of milkshakes I've consumed in the last month
Pretty sure I was impersonating Rihanna when I kept asking him what my name was while we were making out
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
I need to stop agreeing to hang out with people when I'm drunk.
There's just something so liberating about drinking a beer with no pants on
Spoiler alert: my plans for Halloween are going to make our dealer's birthday look like a bunch of mormon ladies having a scrapbooking circle
Well, I sent nudes with an Elmo t shirt on the floor... so there's that.
Is it bad that we left the kid passed out on the bus? I think his name was texas. I was too drunk to be questioning this.
Is it weird I can only picture you in my heels naked?
Be proud; I'm a versatile boyfriend
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