Do NOT cum in me, on me, or in my bed.
I think its only fitting my first purchase with my student loan is a glass pipe? I think ill name it 'Subsidized'
THEY'RE. IN. YOUR. BED. THEY RANDOMLY SHOW UP. AND GET IN YOUR BED.
I have bruises everywhere. I think I took "the drinks are strong" as more of a challenge than a warning.
Just had Jager bombs for breakfast with her roommate... I do not regret this newfound lesbianism.
It's surprise blowjob week. You should be excited.
It's that thing where you don't have any food so you just drink beer to get your needed calories for the day.
Serious question...Is it possible to get a DUI on a kayak?
Girl, that was the lost night of 2012 for me and I have buried that night deep deep away..
She yelled "taste the gay rainbow" in a biker bar. She's either brave or fuckin stupid.
WELL I DIDNT KNOW IT WAS POSSIBLE TO COME SO HARD YOU HAVE AN ASTHMA ATTACK BUT HERE I AM
Which emoticons convey sympathy for sleeping with someones bf ??
No, he came home, unscrewed all of the lightbulbs, and threw them in the sink.
How does it make you feel that I can't control my vagina around you?
I’ll call you later. There’s a jilted trophy wife looking for a revenge fuck at my door
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