your dick doesn't do me any good in arizona
Who knew that being in a committed relationship is the same thing as forced celibacy? Did not sign up for this.
Just washed my feet between classes in the bathroom...Four girls totally judged me...
my way of studying for our final tomorrow: registering online to retake the class in the fall
let's put it this way: i'm gonna stop drinking and get a gym membership. she's that hot
Im still in bed and cant move and i only had Two beers and a shot last night... how did I make it in college?
God gave us a 4 year grace period.
She washed her feet in the sink at white castle. I want this girl in my life.
I have a very hazy flashback of me making out with a guy in a seashell bra??! Can you confirm or deny
I'm going to have to start playing roller derby again so I can blame my sex-related bruises on that.
In my defense, last night's hookup turned out to be my actual girlfriend. That's gotta count for something, right?
I want to reach into my vagina and rip out my uterus with my bare hands. Understand how much it hurts now?
he's just got his life so together and it makes my pussy wet.
You're the third Mark I've fucked in that bed.
Was that you calling me at 4am asking to borrow a rubber ducky and a tampon?
I still don’t believe you, the dog DID NOT tear down the shower curtain and shit on the floor.. we found you in the fetal position in the bathroom holding your tequila gun. It was you!
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