Omg. Just talked to a semi driver from nebraska. Got her truck stuck. Gave her and her riding buddy a glass of vodka and a cig. YES.
I just heard a girl say "We can't go that way, it is a one way street." She was on foot...Nothing worse than girl from the midwest that move to NY to "live out their dream" -the dream of living in a rat and roach infested 200sqft for $2k a month, and get fucked by some recent Ithaca college frat grad...
I went with the blow up doll and I'm glad I did.
She was so wet my fingers were literally pruney when I got done with her
He's yummy.
HE'S GAY. AND 40.
Irrelevant.
All I want is for every tall lanky young guy who is reading in a Starbucks to go balls deep in me. That's all.
From scraping the remnants from a coke bag at a lingerie party to meeting with an 80 year old man to discuss civil rights all in under 12 hours bizarrely feels like the epitome of my life
Welp just pooped in a garbage can. Guess I'm not better than you at life in any aspect.
I'll give you $10 to get a dick pic with a gecko on it.
can anyone on this campus do anything sober?
I was talking to another guy at the bar last night and all of a sudden a flying piece of Sausage lands on my boobs. Then I hear my boyfriend yell, "just marking my territory."
I'm turning twenty & the only honorable way to exit my teens is by slapping the fuck outta the bag. You better be in.
i hope you're proud of yourself! i just had to ask my boss to put ointment on the rugburn on my back. clothes hurt!
I fucked your neighbor. Welcome to the new apartment!
Can we climb Your roof?
No bitch its 2am go home.
Randomize
