Texts From Last Night · Random Texts

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(650): View more from California

Not a fireman, but good enough for last night.

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(650): Not a fireman, but good enough for last night. http://tfl.nu/537l

Replies (2) Good night (852) Bad night (351) Order T-Shirt
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(817): View more from Texas

I wasn't pimping you out... I was helping you network!

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(817): I wasn't pimping you out... I was helping you network! http://tfl.nu/tfom

Replies (3) Good night (2918) Bad night (460) Order T-Shirt
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(513): View more from Ohio

the bulge in his pants is not junk. its hair. trust.

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(513): the bulge in his pants is not junk. its hair. trust. http://tfl.nu/fcbh

Replies (21) Good night (475) Bad night (5673) Order T-Shirt
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(402): View more from Nebraska

New thing to add to the list of never wanted to talk about with my grandma: sweating in ur crouch and vag area

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(402): New thing to add to the list of never wanted to talk about with my grandma: sweating in ur crouch and vag area http://tfl.nu/w77p

Replies (24) Good night (557) Bad night (4038) Order T-Shirt
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(571): View more from Virginia

how many days can you live off of Vicodin and frosty?? im going on 4 days......

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(571): how many days can you live off of Vicodin and frosty?? im going on 4 days...... http://tfl.nu/e1u4

Replies (10) Good night (3406) Bad night (1516) Order T-Shirt
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(610): View more from Pennsylvania

He's only a little bit crosseyed.

(484): View more from Pennsylvania

I think this is one situation where "a little bit" doesn't mean much.

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(610): He's only a little bit crosseyed. (484): I think this is one situation where "a little bit" doesn't mean much. http://tfl.nu/gez3

Replies (3) Good night (945) Bad night (2675)
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(775): View more from Nevada

Were at her birthday dinner and her dad keeps buying me shots saying when I was your age I fucked the shit outta girls

(702): View more from Nevada

Hahahahahaha remind him your dating his daughter

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(775): Were at her birthday dinner and her dad keeps buying me shots saying when I was your age I fucked the shit outta girls (702): Hahahahahaha remind him your dating his daughter http://tfl.nu/jyvi

Replies (9) Good night (4543) Bad night (773)
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(801): View more from Utah

He just climbed off me and used my hairspray to fix his hair. If he hadn't just gone down on me I would think he's gay.

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(801): He just climbed off me and used my hairspray to fix his hair. If he hadn't just gone down on me I would think he's gay. http://tfl.nu/qj10

Replies (19) Good night (1054) Bad night (1908) Order T-Shirt
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(936): View more from Texas

The only funny part about this situation was this morning when they rounded up all the drunks in the ER, piled us into a minivan, then dropped us all off at our houses.

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(936): The only funny part about this situation was this morning when they rounded up all the drunks in the ER, piled us into a minivan, then dropped us all off at our houses. http://tfl.nu/nf3m

Replies (3) Good night (2134) Bad night (1028)
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(864): View more from South Carolina

I'm with Tony. He said he volunteers his ball sack for waxing but you will have to wait a few weeks. It is a freshly shaved sack. I guess he thought he was gonna get lucky. Wtf?

(864): View more from South Carolina

Smooth sack

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(864): I'm with Tony. He said he volunteers his ball sack for waxing but you will have to wait a few weeks. It is a freshly shaved sack. I guess he thought he was gonna get lucky. Wtf? (864): Smooth sack http://tfl.nu/a871

Replies (12) Good night (1002) Bad night (414)
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(202): View more from Washington, DC

Don't linger or you will get sucked into spending the night. Remember the mission mantra: GET OFF

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(202): Don't linger or you will get sucked into spending the night. Remember the mission mantra: GET OFF http://tfl.nu/zpe8

Replies (2) Good night (721) Bad night (283) Order T-Shirt
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(313): View more from Michigan

My therapist thinks I shld paint u something to show u my appreciation 4 ur friendship. 1) she must think I'm rite on the brink of no friends 2) this is real

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(313): My therapist thinks I shld paint u something to show u my appreciation 4 ur friendship. 1) she must think I'm rite on the brink of no friends 2) this is real http://tfl.nu/i6cc

Replies (3) Good night (701) Bad night (450)
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(630): View more from Illinois

And, through a series of unfortunate events, I am at my grandmothers birthday party in a short dress and no underwear

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(630): And, through a series of unfortunate events, I am at my grandmothers birthday party in a short dress and no underwear http://tfl.nu/df24

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(701): View more from North Dakota

This holiday season is going to be rough between people coming home for the holidays and the already regulars on my list I might have to clone my vagina to make sure I get everyone for all they are worth

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(701): This holiday season is going to be rough between people coming home for the holidays and the already regulars on my list I might have to clone my vagina to make sure I get everyone for all they are worth http://tfl.nu/r917

Replies (12) Good night (757) Bad night (457)
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(310): View more from California

Hey, I took a sweater from your house. And, um, your little brother's virginity.

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(310): Hey, I took a sweater from your house. And, um, your little brother's virginity. http://tfl.nu/wgjy

Replies (8) Good night (1392) Bad night (275) Order T-Shirt

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