lol you are funny thanks bro I'll take you to a strip club
I don't wanna go to a strip club I'd rather get my boobs free or earn them from a series of good deeds
Ha! What's wrong with that? Hard work deserves compensation. I accept cash, checks, and boobies!
Last night was so much fun. i kept trying to lick everyone
So I decided to start saving money for my abortion in a tomato sauce jar because it says ‘Prego.’ I know I thought it was fucking genius!
I gave up sex for lent.
I guess that means I'm postponing our date until after Easter.
Have you ever made a sandwich from swedish fish and tortilla chips?
I made him sleep with a condom on and i passed out on the carpet with only a bra on.
Found your dick twin last night
We where late for the party because we spent the last hour staring at a towl becase we thought it was a raccoon
that's all we do, eat and hve sex, eat and have sex. he thinks it's bad and that we need to talk more or whatever but I'm just not seeing the problem...
I thought my ass was sore from the gym then I realized it was from being spanked. Confusing time in my life.
My mom just added me on Facebook... She has one like and it's Will Smith
Virgins should have to wear a badge. This burden is too heavy...
I don't think "growing medical marijuana" is Quite what my Grandfather had in mind when he thought me about gardening as a child
Give me a few. Gonna ride the rollercoaster.
And I’m prepared, because I'm in it to win it (and by win I mean get railed hard)
Randomize
