He seemed more like the type to get donkey punched by a she-male hooker to me
susan atkins died, charles manson's lady
dont cry, there are other serial killers to crush on.
She threw up all over when she was giving me dome. Not even gonna lie, it felt really good.
Just met someone from Jersey. No fist pumps or jagerbombs. Kind of disappointed...
You told me I was special while we were having sex and I asked why.
What did I say?
Don't ask me questions while I have an erection,
Just made hot dog dorito pasta. It happened.
I'm being fed tequila grapes by a girl on stilts...
Are we still banned from the library?
I found your doppelganger. same hair, eyes, personality, catch phrases, and penis. it was mind-boggeling.
sometimes when you're high at work you just have to say fuck it and eat the dog treats
I cut myself stripping on your car. Probably a profession I shouldn't pursue
Jenn from HR called him the new office boy toy. I think I need to bathe in bleach.
I just wish the first erections of my life didn't take place at a dentists office but hey whatever I turned out alright
I just drunkenly signed my mortgage application...
Is this how the global financial crisis happened?
He is a beautiful butterfly covered in tattoos and naked.
Randomize